Anger
by Sixteens
Summary: And her heart. Her heart lay somewhere in the forest, where Sam had dropped it.
1. Prologue

Anger.

The constant never ending anger didn't leave Leah, even during sleep. Everything was so black, so dark, so annoyingly different. She never asked for this. God, she didn't wish that upon her worst enemy. It was awful; to feel so excluded, so angry and betrayed and have no one there to tell you it was going to be all right.

She used to be so naively in love. She gave Sam her whole heart, just tossed it to him like it was nothing and he caught it and held it for a while. She couldn't have been happier. Sam was in love with her. Sam wanted to be with her; aggressive, sharp-tongued, sometimes bitchy Leah. But then _she _came.

Leah remembered the time when she and Emily were the best of friends; sharing secrets and having each other's backs. Leah still hurt from the betrayal. She didn't just lose the love of her life; she lost her best friends as well. It was a hard thing to get over, especially considering the circumstances.

Leah had never been good at controlling her emotions. She was emotional and impulsive, she wasn't ashamed of her own feelings and thoughts and she didn't shy away from voicing them.

Who wouldn't be angry if their boyfriend tossed them aside for their pretty, kind cousin? Anyone would feel bitter and resentful. But no one understood. Or at least they pretended not to. All the morons in the pack, all of them treated her as if she was a nuisance, and maybe she deserved it sometimes but for the most part, she didn't. She wasn't thrilled that she got a peak in their minds, either. Especially not Sam's. Couldn't they understand how embarrassing and frustrating it was? She listened to his thoughts about Emily all the time, she had to endure it every time they shifted and she couldn't switch it off.

She wanted to see how Jacob would feel in her shoes. If he had to listen to that leech worshipper's thoughts about her disgusting boyfriend all the fucking time. He wouldn't be laughing then, she was sure.

She snorted derisively, throwing another pebble in the sea.

And her heart. Her heart lay somewhere in the forest, where Sam had dropped it.

What a pathetic life she had.

…


	2. one

"Five in the fucking morning!" Leah cursed angrily as she stumbled out of bed. "I'm going to kill them! All of them, and feed them to the bloodsuckers." She continued in the same manner as she untangled the covers from her legs and straightened. "I'm coming, you assholes!" She shouted, when another howl piercing through the night. Damn them all to fucking hell. Couldn't they leave her to at least get a little sleep? Didn't she deserve that, after a long day of listening to their pathetic attempts at strategic thinking?

Listening to people being stupid was more exhausting than amusing, especially after a couple of hours. She quickly wiggled out of her underwear – it was a more practical option than having it ripped all the fucking time, and jumped out of the window. She should probably be uncomfortable standing outside naked with god knows how many males surrounding her, but she had never been the type to get easily embarrassed.

Transforming came easily to her, since it relied mostly on anger and she had plenty of it. As soon as she landed on her heavy paws, a stream of male voices filled her entire mind.

'_About freaking time, princess.'_

'_Put some clothes next time, Leah. I didn't want to see that.'_

'_Sleeping beauty has finally risen from her sleep. There is no Prince Charming in sight, though. Where could he be? Oh, wait, he ditched her!'_

'_**Enough!**__'_

Sam's cold, firm demanding tone was the only thing that stopped Leah from jumping on Paul and ending his life prematurely. She growled at him, though, making sure to show plenty of teeth.

' _You're a fucking waste of oxygen, Paul and you say something like that again, I'll neuter with my teeth.'_

'_Oooh, stop talking dirty, Leah, your brother can hear us!'_

'_**I said enough! Both of you! We have more pressing matters to attend to than listening to your petty squabbling! Do that in your free time, now shut up and listen.'**_

Leah sat down on her hind legs unhappily. She continued to growl softly at the silver-furred wolf, but otherwise tried not to interrupt Sam.

"_**I've agreed to the Cullen's over to teach us how to fight those new born vampires.'**_

'_WHAT?'_

They all shouted collectively. Leah stared at Sam incredulously.

'_Are you crazy? We don't need their help!' _She protested loudly. For the first time since… ever, the others agreed with her.

'_That's right. We don't need the bloodsuckers help! Hell, if I get the chance I might just tear one of them to pieces!'_

Leah never thought she'd see the day when she and Paul saw eye to eye.

'_**You'll do not such thing' **_Sam's voice thundered in all of their heads. He shot both Paul and Leah reproachful looks. _**'We have an agreement, and we are going to keep it. This is the smartest strategy. I've even talked to the elders and they have all agreed.'**_

"_But none of them was happy about it.' _Jacob cut in, his voice sounding sardonic.

'_**I'm not happy about it, either, but we have no other choice. They have experience and we don't, we can't run headfirst into battle with only natural instinct. I'm not risking any of your lives because of pride.'**_

'_I find that hard to believe. You've turned into a right bloodsucker lover lately.' _Leah just couldn't stop herself from thinking it, and it wasn't like it wasn't true.

She flinched slightly as Sam sent a wave of anger at her.

'_**We meet with them at ten, at the west side of the forest, on the pact line. You will all be there, or else.'**_

'_Alright.'_

'_Fine but I'm not happy about it.'_

'_Fucking leechers, they fuck up everything.'_

'_**You might not like it but you're going to behave.'**_

'_We're not children, Sam!' _Jared protested, annoyed. _'We got it; no dismembering the Cullens, no matter how tempting it is.'_

'_**Fine. This is all I had to tell you. Dismissed!' **_

Leah caught a glimpse of Emily's scarred face before Sam transformed and cut the link to his mind. She transformed quickly, before anyone could sense her mood and read her thoughts and climbed through the window back in her room.

She hated how much she cared.

She put on her underwear and grabbed a crop top and cut off shorts that lay around in the big mess on her floor and headed for the kitchen. She ate when she was angry. Which was all the time. One good thing that came from the transformation; she didn't gain any weight.

She glanced at the backdoor, expecting Seth to come through it, but he didn't. She scowled as she opened the fridge jerkily and grabbed the leftovers from the lasagna from last night. Ah, well, his loss. She was going to eat all the lasagna and not leave him any.


	3. two

"Leah, can you come here for a minute?"

Leah sighed and stopped stretching. She popped her neck and fingers as she walked towards the kitchen, where she found her mother looking through cupboards. She turned around when she heard her footsteps and a smile flickered on her face.

"Sweetie, I hate to ask this from you, I know how much you hate it, but can you go down to the market?"

Leah groaned. "For what?"

"Well, I'm making mac and cheese and I need ground pepper. Also, I need paprika, soi sauce and coffee, because we're out of it."

"You need all of that for mac and cheese?" Leah asked, raising an eyebrow.

Her mother smiled sheepishly. "Well, no, but since you're already going..."

Leah rolled her eyes. "Where's Seth? Why can't he go?"

"He's out." Sue said quickly, turning her back on Leah, in favour of chopping the onion. Leah's eyes narrowed.

"He's still out?" She asked incredulously and a bit angry. "Honestly, mum, you need to keep him in line. He can't just come and go whenever he wants! Aren't you worried? Because I am!"

"He's with the boys, Leah." Sue said dismissively. "He as safe as he could be."

"So that makes it okay for him to be out he whole night? Do you I need to remind you how old he is? You never let me out for so long when I was his age." Leah crossed her arms across her chest, her face set into a frown. She felt like Paul and some other _interesting _members of the pack were influencing her brother, turning him into this reckless thing that didn't care at all about this safety and that worried her. Seth had such an irritatingly good heard, and he wanted so much to please them all, and he might accidentally do something stupid one day in his attempt to impress someone from the pack.

"That was different, Leah, and you know it. I'm only doing what your father would have done." Leah froze at the mention of her father, the familiar piercing pain her heart returning.

"Really?" She snapped icily. "I don't think he would have been happy to let him associate himself with vampires." She spat the word like it was a disease, which in her opinion, it was. "I think it's just easier for you to let him do whatever he wants. You wouldn't have to worry about him turning into me, right?"

"Leah..." Sue said softly, turning to look at her daughter pleadingly.

Leah only tapped her food impatiently and stuck out her hand. "Whatever, just give me the money."

Sue stared at Leah silently, not moving. Leah stared right back without blinking. "Well," Leah snapped. "C'mon, give me the money before I change my mind."

Sue nodded slowly and fished through her pockets for money. She placed a ten-dollar note in Leah's awaiting hand and Leah quickly shoved it down her pockets. She headed towards the door but stopped before opening it. She turned to her mother and smiled wryly. "Don't pity me, mum." She said quietly. "I don't like it." And with that, she left.

After getting everything from the market and bringing it to her mum, who tried to make things better with a few glossy words and failed, Leah stripped off her clothes in her room, and jumped out the window, transforming in the process. There was still an hour before they had to meet with the Cullen's, and Leah 'couldn't' wait. She snorted inwardly, running between the trees. She loved to run at the fastest speed she could manage, it filled her body with adrenaline and made her forget about her worries for just a moment. The only thing she had to focus on was where she was running, and how amazing the sharp wind felt against her thick fur.

_'Getting poetic there, Leah?'_

Leah nearly collided with a tree at the sudden voice in her head.

_'Jacob, you little shit!'_

Jacob's obnoxious laughter was the only thing she could hear for a couple of seconds, and that was maddening enough.

_'Shut up, you moron. What the hell is wrong with you? I nearly smashed my mug in a tree!'_

_'So? Would be a bit of an improvement, actually.'_

_'Oh, please, I've caught you staring at me, just like the rest of the morons in the pack.'_

_"Well, you have a nice _— _you know what? I better not say.'_

_"If you value your insignificant life, then don't.'_

_"Ouch.'_

_'You deserved it. Huh, you're not feeling very peachy about seeing the Cullen's, are you? Well, join the club.'_

Leah could feel the anxiety and irritation rolling off Jacob, even if they were miles apart at the moment. Oh, the advantages of having their minds linked together.

_'Can we not talk about this?'_

_'You're sending me angst waves. I can't ignore that. Out with it; is it because of dear Bella? Wait, of course it is. You can't stand to see them together, can you?'_

_"Can you sound less gleeful when you say that? That is one of the reasons I don't like you.'_

If Leah could have rolled her eyes in wolf form, she would have.

_'I think you've mistaken me with someone who cares what you think.'_

_'Don't forget I can read your mind and emotions, Leah. Don't try to lie to me.'_

_'No, I genuinely don't care about what goes through your head but here some advice from me.'_

_'Love advice from you? Nah, thanks, I'm good.'_

Leah was starting to get seriously irritated.

_'Listen to me, you snot-nosed brat. When we get there just focus on the fighting, don't look at her or her disgusting boyfriend. You have to try your hardest, otherwise nothing's going to happen. Look, I don't like you all that much either, but you are less irritating than, say, Paul. Of course, they could always not bring her, she's human and has absolutely no business being there except to feel included, which let's face it, she's not. Whatever, some kind of psycho is after her, that doesn't automatically make her a part of everything. She's not going to fight, so she might as well stay home as the useless brat she is.'_

_'Hey! Don't talk about her like that, all right? I know you don't like her_—'

_'Yes, and do you know why I don't like her? Because she is just an eighteen year old girl who has no idea what she wants and what she's doing. She's obsessed with this guy, Edward, and at the same time, she leads you on. I know those type of girls, Jacob. I never liked them. On top of all that, she knows she's fucking useless, she knows she's only going to distract you idiots if something happened to her and at the same time she insists on being there. Talk about selfish. I'm sorry but she hasn't given me any reason to like her. Also, I just can't get what you like so much about her. She seems so boring and annoying, ugh. Also, she's not that pretty.'_

_'Are you done?'_

Jacob sounded supremely annoyed but Leah didn't care. He needed to hear an opinion on Bella from someone who wasn't in love with her, and realise she wasn't all that great.

_'Yeah, although I have a feeling you're not going to listen to me at all. Whatever, your call. But I'm telling you what no one else wants to tell you Jacob. You have no chance with her, give up.'_

_'I already knew that.'_

Leah was overwhelmed with a wave of sadness, hurt and frustration. Double that with her own feelings of bitterness and resentment and she had to stop running in order to get a hold of herself.

_'You didn't know that, and still don't you. You say to yourself you don't have a chance and yet here you are, still hoping she might ditch him and realise you're the love of her life or something equally disgusting. And don't try to deny it; I can read your mind and emotions, remember? Don't torture yourself like I did me. You don't want to feel so shitty at all.'_

_'I think you're still torturing yourself.'_

Jacob tone was softer now, more approachable, almost pitying. That irritated Leah more than when he was snappy and annoyed.

_'Can I go a day without being pitied by someone? I don't need it. I know my own situation. I've accepted it.'_

_'Maybe that's the problem. Don't accept it.'_

_'Too late now. I'm a lost cause.'_

_'Hey you guys! Are you ready to kick some vampire butt today?'_

Both Leah's and Jacob's moods changed radically to their normal selves and they started poking fun at Seth, who was abnormally enthusiastic. Leah couldn't help but think that maybe, maybe this wolf thing wouldn't be so bad, after all.

Of course, she would soon eat her own words.


	4. three

_'The blonde ones looks like he wants to eat us.'_

_'Let him try.'_

_**'Enough.'**  
_

_'Jeez, Sam, you always ruin our fun.'_

**_'One of them can hear our thoughts. I'm just being tactful.'_**

**_'_**_Why bother?_

Leah agreed with Jared. She watched carefully as the oldest looking one of the group, the father or whatever they called him, stepped forward with a polite smile on his face. She didn't like the look in his eyes at all. He was looking at them like they were something to experimented on.

"Welcome." He said.

**_'Thank you for having us.'_**

_'Thank you for having us? That's just disgustingly nice, Sam.'_

_**'Quiet.'**  
_

Edward repeated Sam's thoughts and Leah felt her self bristle. She disliked the thought of having an outside in her head. She had gotten used to the others, more or less, and it wasn't like they were outsiders anymore, but this one? A vampire in her head. It was an awful feeling, almost as awful as they sickening smell.

_'If the blonde one doesn't stop looking at me like I'm his next meal..'_

Sam turned his head to shot Paul a warning look. Paul only grinned in response, or as much as he could grin in wolf form.

_**'We'll only watch, not fight. We don't have the necessary control to participate in the actual fighting.'**_

Edward repeated Sam's words again and the father nodded.

"That is more than enough. My son, Jasper —" He pointed at the blonde one that looked like he wanted to jump and suck their blood. "has experience in the area. He'll teach us how to fight newborns and how to win against them. I'm sure you'd be able to fight them with your own fighting style."

**_'Are they different from you?'_**

The father nodded. "They are all very young — only just a few months old. You could say they are like kids. They don't have experience, or strategy, only incredible strength. As of now, there are twenty of them. Ten for us and ten for you, it shouldn't be hard. It's possible for their number to decrease, they tend to fight between themselves."

_'Idiots.'_

_'Figures.'_

_'Vampires.'_

"We ready to take more than our share, if necessary." Edward said, watching them carefully with glowing amber eyes. Leah growled softly in dislike.

_'No way, asshole. Like we'll let you have all the fun.'_

_'Do you think we can't do our job or something? Guess again'_

_'They sure are full of themselves, aren't they?'_

_"Vampires, what else do you expect?'_

A muscle in Edward's jaw jumped but that was the only reaction to their hostile thoughts. It was freaky how in control he was. Didn't his girlfriend mind he appeared to be made of granite?

Edward's eyes met hers for a moment, and she stared defiantly back at him.

_'What? Do you have a problem, bloodsucker? Don't like to hear the truth, do you? Maybe that's why she likes Jac_—'

_**'Leah, that's enough! All of you, behave!'**_

Leah quieted, but felt a wave of approval from Jacob.

The father smiled. "We'll see how it goes."

_**'Do you know when and where they'll arrive?'**_

"They would be here in four days, approximately. When they near us, Alice would help us cross their path."

**_'Thank you for the information. We'll keep watch.'_**

The blonde one stepped forward, stopping in the middle of the two parties. Leah just now noticed the dozens of teeth scars on his skin, and reeled back, disgusted. Her pack mates did the same. He vampire seemed to sense their mood, and he glanced At Edward but he just nodded and the blonde turned to look back at them with those hungry, agonized eyes.

"Carlisle is right." He spoke in a confident, calm voice that contrasted with his tense posture. "They'll fight like kids. The two most important things you have to remember; first, don't let them wrap their arms around you, and second, don't jump into a direct, one-to-one combat. They're prepared for that, and only that. If you attack from sideways and don't stop moving, you'll confuse them and they won't be able to react appropriately. Emmett?"

The large one stepped forward, a large smile on his face.

Pity he was a bloodsucker, really.

_'Ugh, Leah, seriously?'_

_'Shut up!'_

"All right, Emmett's going to go first. He's the best example for attacking newborn."

_'Oooh, buuurrrn!'_

Emmett narrowed his eyes. "I'll try not to break something." He murmured in a dangerous tone.

The blonde one grinned.

"I meant that Emmett relies on his strength. He jumps right for the target. The newborns would attack in the same way. C'mon, Emmett."

The blonde one stepped backwards and his already tense body tensed even more.

"All right, Emmett, try to grab me."

Leah would never admit, under the threat of death, that she found them fighting somewhat breathtaking. They both were extremely fast, but the blonde was just a bit faster and agile. She could see what Jasper had meant. Emmett attacked straightforwardly, grabbing with his large hands without any form of strategy. Jasper dodged every single of his attacks, which she could see made the large one irritated. Suddenly, Emmett froze, the grin fading off his face. Jasper had grabbed him from behind, his teeth an inch away from his neck.

"Motherfucker!" Emmett cursed.

_'I hate to admit it, but that was neat.'_

_'We have to look out for the blonde one.'_

"One more time." Emmett said, set for revenge.

"It's mine turn now." Edward protested.

"Just a minute." Jasper said, grinning. "I want to show Bella something first."

He waved to the tiny one to join him and she skipped over to him happily.

"I know you're worried about her." He explained. "But I want to show you why you have nothing to worry about."

And then they started to move. It was clear they practiced a lot together, because the tiny one managed to dodge his attack skillfully, as if knowing when and how he was going to attack her. Suddenly, she laughed and jumped on his back. "Gotcha." She said and kissed his neck.

_'Ugh, get a room!'_

"It'd be nice if they learnt some respect." Edward muttered to Bella. They all growled at once. "My turn." He said gleefully.

_'My bet's on Edward. Blondie might have experience but Edward can read minds.'_

_'That doesn't win him the fight, Quil.'_

_'Right, if you say so.'_

They seemed rather equal. Neither of them managed to dominate the other for long, which started to get boring after a while. Finally, the father coughed pointedly and the two came out of their little world.

"Back to work." Jasper said. "We'll write it down as equal."

They all had a go at some point. The blonde girl and the one that was supposed to be the mother were obviously the weakest but they weren't all that bad. Although Leah was sure she could take them both without a problem.

_'Don't get too cocky now, princess.'_

_'Shut up if you don't want me to practice on you.'_

_'I'm so scared.'_

_**'Paul.'**_

_'Ah, and the prince comes to your rescue once again.'_

**_'Paul, I don't like repeating myself. Shut up.'_**

'_Yes, shut him up before I do. Permanently.'_

Paul didn't reply, but it was clear for everyone what he wanted to say. Leah growled at him threateningly but didn't move from her position.

The blonde turned to them and relaxed his posture. "We'll continue tomorrow. Consider yourselves invited again."

**_'Yes, we'll come. We'll also like to get familiar with your individual smell. It would be easier for us in a battle if we could tell you apart from the rest of them.'_**

Edward nodded and relied the message to his family.

"Of course." The father said. "Whatever you need."

_'Is it just me, or does he seem a little too eager to please us?'_

_'For the first time in your life, Paul, you're speaking sense.'_

_'Shut up, princess.'_

_'Very witty.'_

They all stood up on their legs and followed Sam towards the vampires. Leah felt pleased that she was third in line, before Paul. Her nose twitched as they got nearer and the smell of the vampires got stronger and stronger, burning her nostrils. Great. It was like shoving her nose in something extremely cold and sickeningly sweet. It was sticky, blocking out all other scents and making it almost impossible to breathe. She forced herself, however, and stood in front of the mother, who looked down at her with a soft look in her eyes.

She tried not to get too close, in risk of having instinct take over and attack her. She moved onto the blonde one, whose expression contrasted greatly with her 'mother's'. She looked at Leah in disgust, as if she was a dirty, mangy mutt which was staining her expensive carpet, or something. She growled softly before passing onto her boyfriend, the large one. He looked rather gleeful at having wolves sticking her noses at him and sniffing him. Leah again felt regret that he was a vampire. She moved onto the tiny one, who was staring absent-mindedly in the distance, seemingly not sensing the wolves around her. Next was her creepy boyfriend, who seemed to tense more and more with each wolf that passed him. If she could smile sadistically while in wolf form, she would have. Then there was the father, who beside the disgusting smell of the vampire, smelled of something more humane, which freaked out Leah. She quickly moved onto Edward, who looked knowingly down at her.

_'Get out of my head, leech.'_

She shot Bella an unfriendly look and saw her tense slightly. Edward put a protective arm around her and Leah walked away, satisfied with herself. When Leah turned around, she saw Jacob walking towards Bella.

_'Idiot.' _She thought scornfully.

_'Very smart, Jake.'_

_**'Make it quick, Jacob.'** _Sam didn't sound pleased.

_'Whatever. Let's go.'_

They all started to retreat carefully towards the trees, neither of them letting the Cullen's off their sight. As soon as Leah stepped between the trees, she started to run. She had no desire to stay any longer than she had to.

* * *

Leah set at the edge of the cliff they usually dived from, her legs dangling in the air. She threw chipped pieces of the rock in the water, a broody expression on her face to match the dark sky. It was cold and windy, and it looked like it was about to rain but Leah felt the cold air only as a minor annoyance, nothing else. Another reminder of her abnormal condition.

"You did well today."

Leah stiffened, her hands curling into involuntary fists.

"I guess." She replied, trying to sound casual and flippant. She threw the dust of the rock in the water and placed her hands on her lap. "What do you want, Sam?"

"I wanted to check on you." Leah snorted derisively. "I also wanted to talk to you about something."

"Well, I'm all ears." Leah said, her tone sarcastic. "Please, have a seat."

Sam ignored her sarcasm with practiced ease. "I know how much you dislike vampires, and the Cullen's in particular. I think that since the pack is... larger now, you wouldn't have to participate in the fighting, if you feel uncomfortable."

Leah turned to glare at him. "Are you saying you think I can't handle myself?"

Sam raised his eyebrows, his eyes widening in surprise. "No, I—"

"You what? You thought that just because I'm a girl and I wouldn't be able to fight or something? Let me tell you something, I'll be one hell of a fighter exactly because of my gender. You know we women are more spiteful and cruel than men." Sam opened his mouth to speak but Leah cut him off. "Look, I don't like the Cullen's. I can't give two shits if their little human lives or dies, but I know my duty. Despite my feelings, I'm going to do what I need to do."

There was a ghost of a smile on his face. "You make a good wolf, Leah."

Leah laughed bitterly. "That was a cruel thing to say, Sam."

"But it's true."

Leah shrugged and turned her back on him again. "It doesn't make me feel better."

"I know. I'm sorry." His apology had many meanings, and a hollow smile touched Leah's lips.

"That doesn't either."


	5. four

The cold water of the river felt like heaven against her hot skin. She visited the river regularly. Her father used to come here, trying to catch fish. She remembered hating it as a little girl. She hated the fish trips because they were boring. She had no one to talk to except her little brother and he was annoying and clingy. Her father was always amused when she threw a temper tantrum and often threw her in the river in the most unexpected of times to break her out of her broody mood.

It always worked, because he jumped after her and played with her. Then when they got out he'd complain that they had scared all the fish away, but then he'd laugh and ruffle Leah's damp hair.

She really missed him. Even though he was a know-it-all and liked to control her, and sometimes wasn't on her side when he should be, he was still her dad, and he had been the one who took control of everything. Without him, they were all slowly falling apart.

She splashed her face with cold water and let out a content sigh. She heard a snap of a twig and her head shot up. Her eyes widened when she saw Sam standing awkwardly by a tree, looking at her with wide eyes.

It took her a minute to realise why he was staring at her like that. Oops. She was naked.

"What are you doing here?" Leah asked, trying to play cool and not freak out.

"I was going for a swim..." He trailed off and finally looked away, eyes focusing on the ground.

Leah couldn't help the amused smirk. "Are you embarrassed, oh almighty Alpha?"

"You are naked." He said through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, so? You've seen me naked." Her smirk widened. "If fact, I think you know my anatomy better than I do."

Sam closed his eyes, looking very embarrassed. Leah squinted at him, or more accurately, his cheeks.

"Are you blushing?" She asked gleefully.

Sam's eyes flew open. "Of course not." He scoffed. "I'll just go now.."

"Because of me?" Leah asked innocently, trying to keep the wicked grin off her face. "Please, don't let me ruin your fun. The river's plenty big, we can both share it."

Sam smirked slightly. "You were never good at sharing." He pointed out.

"Maybe I've changed." She said with a shrug of her shoulders. "But I can't make you stay. If you want to go, go." She dived under water and started to swim away. She felt strangely victorious that she had managed to unnerve him and make him uncomfortable in that way. Maybe he wasn't so ignorant to her as he pretended to be.

_No, _a sharp voice in her head said, _don't go there, Leah. There are no feelings left. Don't delude yourself._

She resurfaced again, shaking her short, sopping locks away from her face in a distinctly dog-like manner. She wiped the water from her eyes and looked around. She tried to squash the disappointment when she didn't see Sam anywhere. Of course he would leave. He had Emily. She was so stupid.

She sighed and rubbed her eyes. Maybe she shouldn't have poked fun at him? She wasn't in his good books anyway, and now that? It didn't help her at all. He read her thoughts on daily basis, he knew how she felt about all of it, and then she goes and does something like that. She couldn't imagine what she looked like in his eyes now.

"Race you to the other end." A voice from behind her said.

She whirled around in shock, staring at Sam with wide eyes. He smirked, before he dived and started to swim towards the other end of the river. Leah gaped for a moment, than took a hold of herself and dived in the water. She had always been awfully fast, and she caught up to him in no time. But it was hard to keep up with him, he had longer, stronger limbs but she somehow managed. She had superhuman strength now and she got tired very hard, and she didn't have to gasp for breath as often as when she was just a normal human.

Still, it didn't seem to be enough for her to win.

She groaned when he reached the end first. "You had a head start." She accused. "Cheater."

"Don't blame me for losing, Leah." He said, sounding amused. She floated in the water on a considerable distance from him, but still, she felt like that was the closest she'd gotten to him in a long time.

"I still can outrun you anytime, though." She said with a cocky air about her.

"You can outrun us all, that is what makes me feel better." He said, chuckling.

Leah rolled her eyes. "Men."

Sam nodded. His warm expression slowly faded and he looked seriously at Leah. Uh-huh. Now what?

"I hear you've been having problems with Sue and Seth." He said in a would-be casual voice.

Leah stiffed. "That's none of your business." She snapped.

"I know." Sam said quietly, calmly. "Despite what you think, Leah, I still care for you and your well-being." Leah snorted and rolled her eyes. "_I do!_" He insisted.

"Yeah, okay." Leah said, pushing her hair away from her face to give him a sardonic look. "Don't tell me things like that, Sam. You're only making it worse, not better."

Sam sighed. "Everything's so difficult and I'm sorry. I just wanted you to know that... what you think about me isn't true."

"Oh, really?" Leah challenged.

Sam nodded. "Yes. I do care, and I am truly sorry for what happened. If I... if I could go back and change everything, I would." He looked at her with a sincere look, silently pleading her to understand. "I never wanted to hurt you, Leah. I would never do it intentionally."

"We already went through this, Sam." Leah said tersely. "And we agreed that you _can't _go back and change it. So, let's just do me a favour and stopped talking about this. Intentionally or not, you are hurting me, and that's that."

"I'm sorry."

Leah looked at him crossly. "Stop apologising. I thought you understood it doesn't make things better."

"You still deserve it."

Leah shrugged. "Whatever." Silence fell between them. Leah watched water quietly, until she realised there was nothing more to be said. "I'll be going now." She said. "I'll see you around." She sent him a not-quite smile, and started to swim towards where her clothes were.

This whole encounter showed just how much of a masochist she was.

* * *

"Are you nervous?"

Leah was once again on the beach, trying to meditate. Trying, being the key word. At least now that her brother had graced her with his presence, she didn't have to pretend to be doing it. She glanced at him, saw his anxious expression, saw how young he was and sighed.

"Not really." She replied. She didn't feel nervous. She just felt annoyed. She felt vicious. She felt like ripping apart vampires. But not nervous. "Are you?"

"Yeah." He sat beside her, grabbing a fistful of the sand.

"Then don't fight." Leah said, even though she knew it was useless.

Seth shot he ran annoyed look. "I'm going to fight!" He protested. His voice jumped on the octaves a little bit and he blushed in embarrassment. He might be 6 feet tall, with muscles and all that, but he was still a young boy, barely into puberty. Leah felt angry again. It was the stupid vampires that brought trouble. If they weren't there, neither of them would have transformed, and she and Seth would be normal. She would still have Sam, and her father would be alive. So many 'would-haves'.

"Okay, then." Leah said. She had exhausted herself trying to explain to everyone why Seth shouldn't fight. No one listened to her. There was no point in having the same fight over and over again. She'd just have to keep an eye on him during the fight that was all.

Seth looked surprised. "Are you okay with it then?"

Leah shot him a look. "No. I don't want you anywhere near vampires but unfortunately I have no real authority over you."

"You know, I wish you'd stop threatening me like a little kid." Seth said, sounding annoyed. "I'm not a little kid anymore. I can take care of myself just fine. I'm a wolf, too!"

Leah smiled sadly. "I really wish you'd stop thinking you aren't a kid anymore. Because you are, and there's nothing wrong with that. We all allowed each other to be kids when we were your age."

"It was different then." He said stubbornly. "Neither of you had transformed and there were no vampires threatening our town."

"Yes." Leah agreed. "But we can take care of them without you having to put yourself in danger as well."

"So, it's okay for you to risk your life but it's not okay for me to risk mine?" Seth demanded indignantly.

Leah rolled her eyes. "No one would care if I died."

"You know that's not true." Seth said, his indignation and annoyance deflating slightly. "I care and mom cares and Sam cares—" Leah snorted. "He does care, Leah. You're too bitter to actually listen to his thoughts! The pack cares as well. I know they may not act like sometimes and it's not like you don't give them a reason—" Here he gave her a reproachful look. "But they all will risk their lives for you."

"That's because we're in a pack together." Leah explained. "They don't actually care for me. They just feel it's their duty to risk their life for me."

"That's not true." Seth said.

"Whatever." Leah shrugged her shoulders. "It's not like I care if they care."

"Mom sent me here to ask you if you were going to eat dinner with us."

Leah turned to look at him. "Are _you _eating dinner with us?" She asked mockingly.

"Yes." He said, ignoring the mocking tone.

"I'm thoroughly surprised." Leah continued in the same sarcastic voice.

"It's just hard for me to stay in the house after dad, you know." He looked down at his hands. "I just miss him, and being in the house makes me miss him even more. It's hard."

Leah looked at him, her features softening slightly. She sighed and put an arm around her shoulder. "I miss him too, kid."

"I know." Seth said quietly. He rested his head on her shoulder. "You know it wasn't your fault, right?"

Leah swallowed heavily, closing her suddenly burning eyes. "Yeah."


	6. five

_'Ugh, why does she always act like a victim?'_

When Jacob finally transformed to join them, his whole conversation with Bella was open for all of them to see it.

_'I love you? Well, that's a fantastic way to show it. You two are just so dramatic. Kids.'_

_'Shut up, Leah!'_

Leah only snorted derisively. She avoided looking at Sam, even though she could feel his dark, wolfish eyes on her. She tried to think of anything but their most recent encounter.

_'If you can't focus on the fighting, stay with her.'_

Leah meant that as a sincere advice but her sarcastic voice slightly ruined it.

_'I can fight just fine.'_

_'I'm sorry, Jake.'_

_'Yeah, me too.'_

_'It's all right guys. We all knew this was going to happen eventually.'_

_'That's one hell of a kiss, though.'_

_'Yeah, imagine what she was thinking; I'll kiss him after I told him I don't love him enough. What harm can it do?'_

_'Leah, I'm warning you. I'm not in a mood to deal with you and your issues right now.'_

_'Yeah, I'm just telling you what no one else wants to tell you.'_

_'There's a reason we don't, princess, it's called tact.'_

_'Don't make me laugh, Paul. You are anything but tactful.'_

_'Can we all change the subject? Jake clearly doesn't want to talk about it.'_

_'Thanks, Seth.'_

_'Oh, they're fighting.'_

_'I'm just going to move now.'_

_'Seth, stay where you are!'_

_'This is private, Jake! You don't want to hear any of it anyway! I'm sorry!'_

_'You little_—'

_'Oi, that's my little brother you're talking to!'_

_'**Calm down all of you and focus! They are nearly here!'**_

They stopped snapping at each other and straightened. They were all there, except for Edward and Seth. Leah had been so relieved and grateful when Sam ordered Seth to stay out of the main battle. Although now she couldn't keep an eye on him. For the first time (she hoped it would be her last ) in her life, she relied on a bloodsucker for something. If he, god forbid, let anything happen to Seth, no pact would be able to stop her from ripping him apart.

**_'Calm and focused, Leah.'_**

Sam reminded. Leah growled at him in annoyance. Suddenly, they felt the overwhelming presence of their enemy species. Their smell came a second later and they all tensed, ready for a fight.

The differences between the newborns and the Cullen's were painfully obvious. For one, their blood-red eyes that glowed eerily. Then there was the way they held themselves and moved. The Cullen's had all adopted a human way of moving and talking, but the new ones didn't bother.

They didn't wait for an invitation. They attacked immediately. Leah moved towards a young girl who was growling threateningly. When she noticed her coming, her face split into a feral grin and she lunged towards Leah. Just as Leah was ready to take her, Sam jumped in her way and jumped on the vampire, quickly shredding her to pieces.

_'She was mine!'_

Leah growled in her mind.

Sam didn't reply, but the clear image of her being safe from all the newborns was enough for her. Instead of feeling happy that he was concerned of for her, she felt angry.

_'I told you I can handle it!'_

She growled again, looking wildly around. She noticed Quil fighting with large, black one and started running towards him. She jumped on the newborns back and sunk her teeth in the hard skin. She ripped off his head with one sharp movement of her head and then proceeded to do the same with the rest of his body.

_'Leah, look out!'_

Leah jumped aside when she heard Quil's alarmed voice and a shrieking female fell on top of the black one's remains. Judging by the way she jumped up and stared at what was left of him, they hadn't been just mere acquaintances. She and Quil attacked her from both sides, hoping to confuse her and take her down. When Quil managed to jump on her and slam her in the snow, Leah turned around to search for another victim. Everyone around her was fighting, the Cullen's gracefully and precisely, the wolves messy and loudly. A scary smirk appeared on Leah's wolfish face, and sprang in action again.

Just as she was fighting with another one, jumping back and forth to escape the deadly clutches, Seth's excited and anxious voice filled her head.

_'She's here! She came!'_

She froze slightly, giving the vampire a clear opening to pounce on her. A black blur slammed into the vampire before he was able to grab Leah, and she blinked, startled.

_'Seth, are you all right?'_

_'Yes, I am! Don't worry about me!'_

_**'Leah!'**  
_

Sam sounded pissed. Leah's head snapped to look at him. He advanced over her, and she was forced to slowly lower herself.

**_'Focus or leave!'_**

_'I'm focused!'_ She snapped. _'Stop babying me!'_

_**'You nearly got killed!'**  
_

_'I could take him down!'_

_**'No! Stop being so cocky!'**  
_

_'I'll be cocky, if I want to be cocky, all right? Go fight and leave me alone!'_

_'I hate to interrupt you, but we are not done. More are coming.'  
_

Sam bared his teeth at her. _**'Stay safe.'**_He ordered.

_'As you wish, boss.'_

Sam didn't say anything and ran away. The next ten minutes were probably the most annoying in her whole life. Sam managed to keep her out of the fighting, which pissed her off to no end. Who was he to act like that? If he wanted her not to be there, he could have just ordered her an as Alpha but no. No, this was not how he did things. No, he left her there to watch how everyone did their job while she stood aside and watched as a curious bystander._  
_

She felt like Bella, for god's sake. She wasn't going be the pack's Bella. The mere thought of it made her want to puke her guts out.

She looked around, searching for something, anything to attack and prove to those idiots that she wasn't just a pathetic girl who couldn't take care of herself. She noticed a movement with her peripheral vision and her head snapped to the right. She sniffed hungrily and stepped towards the trees. The disadvantage of having so many leeches at the same place was that everything smelled of them. She could pick out the Cullen's individually but the newborns were just lost in the stench.

But she could pick out movement somewhere in the trees and she slowly and cautiously walked towards her target. It was a man, leaning against one of the trees in hope not to be noticed and probably jump on someone from behind. She bared her teeth in disgust and trying hard not to think about it, she jumped towards him. But he seemed to have sensed her, either that, or he had even faster reflexes than the rest of the vampires, because he spun around and wrapped his arms around her middle. She started trashing and trying to bite him but he only squeezed. She howled in pain as she heard a few cracks and a piercing pain shot through her entire boy. She continued to fight however, trying to bite off his arms or if she was lucky, his ugly head.

_'Leah!_

_Leah!_

_**'LEAH!'**_

_'Damn it, princess, don't get yourself killed!'_

She froze in fear when she saw him opening his mouth, probably to sink his teeth into her. She started moving in panic, frantically trying to escape. One bite from the bloodsuckers and she was gone. Snap. Just like that.

But before the vamp could sink his teeth in her skin, a rusty coloured wolf jumped on his back. The vampire had no other choice but to let her go and she landed on the ground loudly, emitting a sound between a yelp and scream when she landed on her, presumably, broken bones. She watched as the vampire and Jacob started to fight and attempted to get up, but only to fall back with another yelp. Suddenly a blood-curdling scream erupted from Jacob and her entire fur stood up.

_'Jake!_

_'JAKE!_

A group of wolves stormed in, and Leah saw Paul biting into the vampire's back mercilessly. She tried to get up again, but pain shot through her body again and she hissed, slowly falling back on the ground.

Motherfucking vampires.

_'Jake, Jake, man, can you hear me? Please, please, tell me you can hear me.'_

_'It hurts.'_

_'I know, man. But you're going to be fine. Promise.'_

_'It hurts. Make it stop.'_

_'We'll make it stop, man. Just hang in there.'_

_'Too much... hurts too much...'_

Sam was the one who approached Leah; he didn't say anything but she could hear and read the gist of his feelings. She shrunk slightly, closing her eyes as pain enveloped her.

**_'I told you to be careful.'_**

He was trying to be calm. That never bode well.

_'I was careful.'_

_**'No, you weren't. You have to transform now.'**_

_'What? Are you crazy?'_

**_'You can't walk, and I'll carry you to La Push.'_**

_'I can walk just fine!'_

**_"Leah, I have no time to deal with your stubbornness right now! You are going to transform; I order you to!'_**

_'Damn you.'_

"Sam?" They both turned to look at the father, who was holding a beige garment in his hands. "Emmett offered his shirt for Leah." He said.

Leah shot it a disgusted look, then turned to look at Sam accusingly.

_'Joy to the fucking world.''_

Sam ignored her and took the shirt from the father with his mouth, and threw it at Leah. He then turned and lowered his head to the father a sign of thanks. _  
_

_**'Transform and put it on. No complaining. Jacob might be dying, and it's all your fault.'**_

That stung. She blinked a couple of times and grudgingly tried to calm down enough to transform. It was hard, she was still tense and with all the vampires around her, her natural instinct to stay in wolf form and protect herself was stronger than her will to transform. But she did it eventually, maybe those mini meditating sessions she had helped somewhat. Sam was looking away from her, but was standing in front of her though, shielding her from everyone's eyes.

Her left arm was bend on an unnatural angle, and her right leg felt pretty damn shitty. She tried to put the stinking shirt as quickly as she could with an injured arm and when she was done, she set up and winced.

Sam turned around. He bent down silently, and she bit her lip before she climbed on his back, plastering a displeased look on her face. She looked around. There was no sign of Jacob and the rest of the pack.

They didn't return in the clearing, instead Sam started to run through the trees in the direction of the reserve. She tried to cling onto him as hard as she could without hurting herself. It hurt when she breathed to hard, too, which led her to believe she had broken ribs too.

Great. Just what she need.

She hoped Jacob was okay.

* * *

Leah slowly stirred, her eyes flickering open. Everything was blurry for a few seconds and she blinked to clear her vision. She rubbed her eyes with one hand and tried to sit up, and her good arm shot up to her stomach as if to stop the pulsating pain. "Fuck." She muttered, closing her eyes. She opened them again and raised her injured arm and saw she had a white cast on. She could feel tight bandages around her stomach, slightly cutting into her skin. She glanced down, her leg was in a cast as well. "Don't I look just dashing..." She muttered to herself.

Something creaked from behind her and she turned her head around. Her window was being open, and a minute later Sam, in his 6 and something inches slid through her window and in her room.

"Mom won't he happy you aren't using the door." Leah said as she looked away from him.

"She'll forgive me, I think." Sam said, his voice cool.

"How's Jacob?" Leah asked quietly, staring at the faint hand print on the wall beside her bed.

"He's recovering. Carlisle said he'll be as good as new in no time."

"That's good." She muttered.

"He could have died." Sam said. "You could have died. If only you had listened to me, Leah. Why do you insist on making everything so difficult?"

"Why do you insist on treating me like I have no idea what I'm doing?" Leah asked, her voice even.

"You clearly don't know what you're doing, otherwise you wouldn't be lying here and neither would be Jacob!"

Leah gritted her teeth. "I'm sorry for Jacob, okay? I didn't want him to get hurt."

"I know you didn't, but he still got hurt and only because of your recklessness. What are you trying to prove, Leah? Why is everything about proving something or getting back at someone with you?"

Leah turned to stare at him. "_Excuse me? _If you hadn't treated me like I might break, maybe I wouldn't have done it!"

Sam glared at her. "So now you're blaming me?" He snorted. "Typical."

Leah rolled her eyes. "Why are you here, Sam?"

"Strange as it might seem to you, I wanted to check up on you." Sam said. He sat down on her desk chair, resting his elbows on his knees.

"Yeah, make yourself at home." Leah said sarcastically. "You checked up on me, didn't you? You can leave now."

Sam ran a hand through his hair. "Can you stop being such a bitch just for a moment?"

Leah swallowed. "Yeah, that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy." She said sarcastically. "You should go. Emily's waiting for you." She tried not to sound too bitter as she said it.

Sam sighed. "Can we not make this about Emily for once?"

"It's kind of hard not to." Leah replied. "You did dump me for her. And before you say anything, I know why you did it." She closed her eyes. "That doesn't make it any better, though."

"I know." Sam said quietly. Leah opened her eyes and looked at him. He looked sad, his dark brown eyes were cast downward, staring at his hands. "I hate myself for doing his to you, Leah."

Leah smiled wryly. "I'm sure."

"I never wanted hurt you. I never wanted you to turn into a wolf. It was such a shock. I knew you'd hate it. I knew you'd feel like an abnormality, like you didn't belong. I never thought things could get so hard between us, Leah. I remember, before all of this mess, how we dreamed about our future. We were going to buy that cute little cottage close to the beach after we graduated, you were going to become a vet, and I was going to work with cars or something like that. I never really decided. We were going to have three kids, two boys and girl. You wanted to teach the girl how to defend herself and beat people up, and you wanted to teach the boys how to fish, even though you hated it."

"Why are you telling me this?" Leah asked. Her throat felt suspiciously tight at the moment. "You said you didn't want to hurt me. Why are you telling me this?"

Sam looked regretful. "I still want this life for you, Leah. You deserve it so much. I wish I could be the man you marry and have kids with but.."

"There's Emily." Leah said knowingly. "See, our conversations always lead to her, one way or another."

"It's stronger than me, Leah." Sam said, his voice strained. "I love you." Leah blinked, staring at him, startled.

"What did you say?" She whispered, hoping she had heard wrong. She couldn't deal with this right now.

"I love you." He repeated, his voice stronger now. "I don't think I ever stopped, even after the imprinting. I thought you'd like to know."

"No, no I wouldn't!" Leah protested. Sam looked at her in confusion. "How could you tell me something like this now, Sam? Do you have idea what effect those words have? You can't just tell me you love me and then leave and have a happily ever after with Emily!"

Sam shook his head. "I can't leave her, Leah. It's stronger than me."

"So it's stronger than you now?" Leah nearly shrieked. Ignoring the pain in her stomach she sat up. "What the hell is wrong with you? I can't even from words right now."

"I thought... I thought you want to hear this." Sam said, still looking confused and slightly shocked at her reaction.

"No! I mean, yes, yes I did but I don't want it to be followed by I can't leave her, it's stronger than me. Telling me you love me it's like telling me 'keep pining after me! Do you want me to continue to be in love with you?"

"I.. don't—"

"You don't want?" Leah snapped, her eyes narrowing. "Look, Sam, do you think you'd be able to leave Emily?"

"I don't —"

"Yes or no will suffice!" Leah said impatiently.

Sam looked at her, annoyed. She glared back at him.

"Let me answer for you; no. No, you won't be able to leave her. Why? Well, because obsessive love trumps real love any day."

Sam's eyebrows shut up. "Obsessive love? It's not obsessive!" He said indignantly. "I do love her."

"Fine, let's say you do. But it was forced on you, wasn't it? You didn't choose her yourself? Yeah, I don't think that's real love. The whole concept of the imprinting is stupid. It supposedly finds your soul mate; but what if they aren't any soul mates? Why do you need to have someone who matches you perfectly? You say it's stronger than you. It consumes you, doesn't it? You think about her all the time. Can you even get properly angry at her?" Leah raised an eyebrow, knowing the answer. "Beside the first time, you've never gotten properly angry at her, why? Because you can't. Because this weird gene curse doesn't allow you to. It forces you to feel happy with someone you wouldn't otherwise be with. Take Jacob for example, he loves Bella, but he hasn't imprinted on her. That doesn't mean she's not a good match for him. Although... that isn't really a good example." Leah sighed. "Look, what I'm trying to say here is, maybe you don't have to be with Emily. Maybe you can be happy with someone else beside her."

Sam looked dumbfounded. "I never thought of that."

Leah smiled a little sadly. "I've had plenty of time to. But, as I said obsessive love trumps real love. You might be happy with someone else but the curse gene makes it hard for you."

"Why do you keep calling it a curse?"

"Because it is." Leah said scornfully, scowling. "It ruins lives. It's disgusting, how you turn into a slave to the person you've imprinted on. Don't try to deny it. It makes you want to do anything to please your imprintee, even if it goes against your morals and believes. It takes over your mind and emotions and controls you and you let it." Leah shrugged. "That's my opinion on it."

"You haven't imprinted. You don't know how it feels; it's not easy to break out of it as you think. It's hard. I do believe I love Emily, Leah. It's not just the imprint, I do genuinely love her but the imprint makes it all ten times stronger."

Leah's face hardened. "Then you have no right to tell me you love me. You have no right to give me hope. It's not right. It's not fair."

"You're right." Sam said, his shoulder slumping. "You're right. I just, I wanted you to know that I cared."

"But you don't care enough." Leah said softly. "And that makes me feel even worse."

"I wish—"

".. things were different." Leah finished for him. "Yeah, you've said that already. But things aren't different. This is reality, as harsh as it is. You love me, but it's just not enough. I just have to live with it. Please, don't say you're sorry. I'm sick of your apologies. After a while, they tend to lose meaning." She tried to muster up her usual sarcastic smile, but her lips merely twitched before they fell into a thin line again.

"I've made things worse, haven't I?" Sam asked miserably.

"Yeah." Leah said bluntly. "You did."

He stood up. "I should go now."

"Yeah, you should." Leah said, lying back carefully.

"Get well soon." He said softly.

She only nodded, without saying anything.

"Goodbye, Leah." Her window creaked against as he opened it and slipped outside, then closed it again. Leah bit her lip in attempt to hold back a sob. She didn't want to cry. She was so sick of crying and feeling sorry for herself.

There was a knock on the door, and Leah lifted her head a bit to see her mother poking her head inside her bedroom.

"I heard everything." She said softly. Her face was soft with pain and sympathy. Leah tried to swallow the lump in her throat. "Do you want me to come in?"

"No." She didn't want anyone to see her cry. Even her mother. "I'll be all right. Thanks anyway."

Sue looked disappointed, but nodded anyway and left the room quietly.

"I'll be all right." Leah repeated. "Someday, I'll be all right."


	7. six

_**Authors note: A little short and nothing much is happening but we still have a bit of Jacob/ Leah bonding and that never hurt anybody! I love those two as friends but as friends because Leah belongs with Sam! ANYway, I wanted to thank you all for your lovely reviews and your lovely support and ohmygod I love you guys. I swear I do! ;d This week might be a bit cluttered for me, but I will try to find some time to write another chapter. Please keep reading and leave a review on your way out. They are always much appreciated!**_

* * *

Lea stared at the house before her, rubbing her hands nervously in her shorts. She was fully recovered and nothing hurt anymore, but she hadn't transformed in weeks, in fear of stumbling on Sam and his thoughts. Her heart still beat faster just thinking about their conversation. She was both angry and happy, and then she was more angry because she was happy and she knew she shouldn't be, because even though she said he loved her, he wasn't coming back to her.

She sighed and marched up the uneven path to the house, knocking on the door rather loudly. She waited impatiently for the door to open and when it didn't, she moved to peek in the house through the windows. She jumped when she heard the creaking of an old door and turned around to see Billy Black and his wheel chair at the threshold of the house.

"Hey, Billy." She greeted casually, as though he hadn't just caught her peeking in his house through the window. Billy smiled pleasantly, his black eyes twinkling with amusement.

"Leah. To what do we own the pleasure?" He asked as he wheeled himself back into the house, wordlessly inviting her in. She followed him inside and closed the door behind her.

"I just wanted to check up on Jacob." She said. She felt great respect towards Billy, they all did, and she felt rather small under his scrutinizing, wise gaze. The knowledge that he would have been the Alpha of his pack had the gene not skipped him made him a pretty big figure in their small community.

Billy smiled. "He's all right, but very grumpy that the doctor doesn't allow him to get out of bed yet."

Leah wrinkled her nose. "I thought I smelled something disgusting."

Billy chuckled. "You can go in his room. He'll appreciate any kind of company right now."

"Thanks." Leah said, trying not to sound too sarcastic. She didn't miss the implied insult in there, and as she walked towards Jacob's room, she couldn't help but roll her eyes at the old men, great respect or not. She pushed the door open without knocking, which hindsight was rather rude. Thankfully, Jacob was doing anything potentially scarring in there. Although seeing him read a book, out of all things, was a bit startling.

"Leah?" He sounded and looked surprised. They had removed the cast from his arm and legs but he was still tightly wrapped in bandages. There was a pair of crutches propped by his bed as well. He looked awful, too, with circles and dark shadows under his eyes and his skin paler than usual. "What are you doing here?" His eyes narrowed slightly and Leah cleared her throat awkwardly, unsure how to go about this.

"Okay, I'm going to say this just once." She said firmly. "I'm sorry." She thought she might choke after saying this. She usually didn't apologise, and when she did, she rarely did it vocally. Most of the time she showed she was sorry with her actions. Jacob stared at her with a blank look on his face for several moments that burst out uproarious laughter.

"Don't laugh at me, you moron!" She snapped through gritted teeth, her hands curling dangerously.

"Y-you.." He tried to take in a deep breath and winced, his right hand going to his stomach. "You look constipated. Does it really hurt so much to say that you're sorry?"

"Yes." She resisted the urge to stomp her foot, she was not one of those women and crossed her arms across her chest. "Well, are you finished laughing at me?"

"Yeah." He said, rubbing his stomach.

"Payback." Leah said with a smirk. Jacob rolled his eyes but a smile twitched at the corner of his lips anyway.

"So, how're you holding up? Do you feel more special now that you're a hero?"

"A hero?" Jacob raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, yeah, saving my life and whatnot." Leah said.

Jacob snorted. "Like they'll think I'm a hero for saving _your _life."

"Nice. Very nice." Leah said, trying to appear indifferent, even though it stung.

"You know I'm just teasing." Jacob said with a grin. He sighed. "I want to get out of here, you know."

Leah grunted sympathetically. She pulled out his old chair from his desk that had a coat of dust covering it and sat down, crossing her legs Indian style. "I know how you feel. I was going crazy back in the house. Seth was always out doing whatever he wanted to and I was stuck at home alone with mom all the time and we're not exactly chummy right now. But you already know that." She grumbled the last part, still unhappy that he and the rest of the pack could read her mind.

"Yeah." Jacob was looking at her with an odd look in his eyes. She raised her eyebrows, hoping that would distract him but he seemed to looking right through her.

"Oi, earth to Black." She snapped, waving her hand in the air. "You still there, brat?"

Jacob snapped out of it and scowled at her. "You know, you really should stop calling me brat."

"I will when you stop being one." Leah answered promptly.

"You're really difficult, you know that?" Jacob asked with a sigh, rubbing his eyes.

"Is that a nice way of saying I get on your nerves?" Leah asked with a smirk. "Why, I didn't know you did the nice thing, Jacob."

"Oh, haha." Jacob said, letting out a sarcastic laugh. "You know, Seth stopped by a couple of days ago. He said something about you.." Jacob hesitated and Leah stomach churned unpleasantly, because she knew who she was going to say next. "and Sam." He eyed her carefully, as if expecting her to explode.

"You know, Seth really need to learn to keep his mouth shut." Leah snapped, crossing her arms moodily. "You gossip like school girls, I swear."

Jacob shrugged. "Well, we're school boys, so we're not that far off. Besides, once I transform, I would know right away. You're the talk of the pack now. Well, when Sam's not around at least. In his defense, he had tried to keep it hidden but you know that doesn't last for long."

"In his defense?" Leah snorted and smiled bitterly. "In short, he came, gave me hope than shattered it, along with the remaining pieces of my heart. I don't think he deserves defense in any account."

"No, he probably doesn't." Jacob said. "Well, if it makes you feel better, I think he screwed up."

"Yes, your opinion means the world to me." Leah replied with her usual snark.

Jacob looked annoyed. "I'm just trying to make you feel better, no need to bite my head off."

"I'm just used to reacting this way." Leah said with a shrug. "And why do you bother being nice to me anyway? You never did before."

"Well, I'm a guy, I think it comes natural for us to be insensitive, besides I know how you feel now." He looked down at his hands and shrugged. "I guess it would be hypocritical of me to be annoyed at you when I'm the same right now."

"Oh, right.. Bella." Leah said her name with distaste. She saw Jacob rolling his eyes and smiled to herself. "Well, if it makes you feel better, I think you're batter than her pastry, blood-sucking boyfriend. I mean, not only does he smell but how he talks makes me want to smack him and tell him we live in the 21st century."

Jacob snorted. "I know, right?"

"Yeah and just how possessive he is?" Leah made a disgusted face. "I tell you, she's going to feel suffocated one day, after she gets over whatever obsessive, honey moon stage she is in right now."

"Yeah." Jacob said, but he didn't seem enthusiastic.

Leah understood. Even if she did get out of the honey moon stage, she'd still stay with Edward and apparently marry him. Silly girl. Who would want to tie down with the first boyfriend they ever had? Leah then remembered her relationship with Sam and promptly stopped thinking on the subject.

"Well, how does it feel to be the second best?" Leah asked, not bothering to hide her bitter tone.

"It sucks." Jacob muttered.

"Welcome to my life."


	8. seven

_**So sorry for the late and short update. I have absolutely no time on my hands and this has resulted in me neglecting most of my stories. But I told myself that I'll sit and write something down, even if it is short, because I know how it sucks to not have a story updated. Anyway, thanks for all the lovely reviews again, you make my day. I'm sorry to say that I'll probably won't be updating for long again. I'm leaving with my sister and her friends on a skiing trip, and I'm not sure if around Christmas I'll have time to write anything at all. I'll try, though. Christmas is time for miracles after all. Thanks again and I hope you like my sorry excuse for a chapter! **_

_**- Alex **_

* * *

Leah zipped up her overstuffed duffle bag with a sigh and set down on her bed. She was leaving with her mother for about two weeks to go visit relatives in Washington D.C. Normally she refused to go with her but with everything happening, she felt like she needed a little break. She needed to be away from Sam for a while, because being so close to him every day, knowing that he still had feelings for her was just killing her inside. She wanted what was best for him but at the same time she had a selfish desire for him to dump Emily and be with her. She could never win.

There was a knock on the door and her mother's head poked her head inside a second later. "I'm just going to stop by Charlie to give him the lasagna I made and we're leaving."

Leah made a face. "Why are you cooking for him again?"

Her mother pursed her lips. "Because his daughter is too busy planing her wedding and he can't cook to save his life. I'll be back in ten to fifteen minutes tops." A quick smile flickered on her face before her head disappeared and she closed the door softly.

Leah stood up and shoved her hands in her cut off jean shorts, wondering what to do with herself until her mother arrived. They'd be going there with a plane, even though Leah preferred to run there, even if it'd be exhausting. Her mother would here none of it and after Leah learned she had already bought the tickets, she was forced to submit to her mother's wishes. Only this time, though. Seth would be staying, much to her irritation. Her mother assured he that Sam and Emily would look perfectly well after him, along with Billy and the other adults, but Leah still couldn't believe her mother could be so irresponsible as to leave her fifteen year old son alone to be looked after other teenage boys.

Unbelievable, really.

She heard the front door opening and her head snapped up.

"I'm home!" Seth's voice rang through the whole house and Leah left her room. She met him in the kitchen, where he dropped a shopping bag on the kitchen island and turned to open the fridge to grab something to eat. "Hey, Leah." He said without turning around. "Why are you angry again?"

"What?" Leah asked, confused. "I'm not angry."

"Yes, you are." Seth said as he turned around, hugging various ingredients for a sandwich to his chest. "You're breathing the way you breathe when you're angry. So out with it. Did you and mom fight again?" He frowned as he dropped his stuff on the kitchen island beside the unpacked shopping bag.

"My breathing?" Leah asked incredulously.

Seth nodded, a grin spreading across his face. "Yup. You breath, like, really deep when you're angry. I guess it's a wolf trait or something, or just a quirk of yours, I don't know." He shrugged. "Do you want a sandwich? But tell me why you're angry first."

"I just don't like that you'd be staying here alone." Leah said as she crossed her arms. "And yes, I want a sandwich."

Seth grimaced and shot her an annoyed look. "That again? I thought we had it all sorted out. I'll be fine. I'll be with the guys all the time, you have nothing to worry about. You know I'd be dead bored, there's no point in making me go."

"Yes, but I'd be able to keep an eye on you." Leah grumbled.

"You don't have to do that." Seth said, his voice firm. "Stop acting like my mom, Leah. I know you care and all but it's getting annoying and offensive how you have no faith in me. You know nothing will happen to me when I'm with the pack. Do you think Sam or any of the others guys would allow it? Come on, you might not like them but you know they'd never leave me alone if I'm ever in danger, which I wouldn't be."

"You're growing up too fast." Leah said with a sigh, putting her elbows on the kitchen island and leaning forward. "I'll be calling you non-stop, you know that, right?"

Seth grinned, looking relived that she wouldn't be going into one of her rants again. "I could always ignore your calls."

She shot him a deadly glare. "Don't you dare or I'll run back here and kick your ass she-wolf style."

Seth rolled his eyes, but his lips were twitching. "Fine, _mom."_

"At the moment I'm acting more like your mother than mom." Leah said as as grabbed a slice of bacon and shoved it in her mouth.

Seth sighed and looked pleadingly at her. "You know mom's going through a lot. It's hard on her. You should be more understanding, you know."

"I was understanding." Leah said carelessly. "But I have my limits."

"Please try not to fight with her a lot when you leave. For me." Seth looked so sad and dejected that Leah sighed and nodded. A smile brightened his face and focused his attention on making the sandwiches. Leah watched him silently, wistfully remembering the little kid that used to bump into her legs, hug her around the waist and look up at her with wide adoring eyes, asking if she'd please play with him. He had been such a cute kid.

"There you go." Seth said, jerking her out of her thoughts. He handed her the sandwich and smiled. "I'll make one for you to eat on the plane, okay?"

Leah smiled and nodded, taking her sandwich from him. "Thanks, Seth."

"No problem." Seth replied easily, biting off half of his sandwich. "I'll miss you, you know. Being all over-protective and pissing off Paul."

Leah laughed. "No you wouldn't, but thanks anyway."

Sue returned ten minutes later, announcing they were ready to go. Leah grabbed her stuff from her room and gave Seth a tight hug, allowing herself to show more of her emotions than usual. Seth assured her quietly that he'd be all right, no trace of annoyance in his voice and she nodded.

They were driving her to the airport and as Leah sat on the passenger seat in her father's car, she allowed herself to indulge in memories of him, for just a moment. If she hadn't, she would have noticed the large black wolf peeking from between the streets, watching as the car drove far away from him.


End file.
